It happens at least once a week, the ritual trek to the local grocery store.  We need food, we need supplies, we are creatures whose needs must be met, and this is how we do it.  It’s more convenient than growing our own vegetables, or baking our own bread.  And although we may not get the same satisfaction that our ancestors did by working the land, we are in a sense doing our own harvesting by what we choose, and how we shop, at the supermarket.

Here are some ways that we can get the most out of the experience, and turn what could possibly be mundane into something rather special and spiritual.  This is how we can “bloom where we are planted” even if that happens to be in the middle of suburbia.

Bring your own bags.  This seems like such a simple thing to do, and yet when you look around at the other shoppers, how many people actually do it?  In Europe there is not the option of “paper or plastic.”  You bring your own bag or you carry your purchases out in your arms.  We did an informal survey recently in front of our neighborhood market, and found that although most people thought this was a good idea, they hadn’t gotten themselves in the habit.  Make this conscious choice.  Carry your bags in your car so they are there for you when you need them.  It’s one little contribution towards making the world a better place.

After you park, if you see a stray cart in the lot, take it with you into the store.  Many carts are left loose in the parking lot only to bump into cars, or block the way as someone is trying to open their car door.  Returning a cart is being a good citizen, and also setting a good example.

Many stores have now been kind enough to provide anti-bacterial wipes at their entries so that we can wipe down the handle of the cart.  Use them to protect yourself and others from germs that are easily passed around in public places.  And when you’re done with the wipe, dispose of it carefully in the container provided.

When shopping for produce, choose fruits and vegetables that are locally grown.  Shipping from far-away places puts a burden on the planet by requiring extra fuel to get items where they need to be.  Also, be aware of packaging.  Again, re-use bags from home, or don’t bother to use bags at all when selecting your produce.  Select one thing that you might not have tried before – open yourself up to new culinary possibilities!

Consider your time in the market as an opportunity to practice present-moment awareness.  Be fully present when choosing your items.  Smile at the people sharing this experience with you.  This is a community, and you are an important part of it.  Be grateful for the store employees who work so hard to keep the place neat and orderly so that you can find what you are looking for.  Marvel at the abundance of choices that we have before us.

Think about the many ways that you can be a conscientious consumer.  Rather than buying paper napkins, use cloth napkins at the table for dinner.  Rather than using paper towels to clean, use dish-cloths, and rags.  Rather than using cleaning products with chemicals, investigate the many natural alternatives, such as vinegar, that can be used just as efficiently with less impact on the planet. Take lunch boxes, or cloth lunch bags, to work or school instead of using paper lunch bags.  These are all the little things that end up making a big difference.  Consciously participate in green living.

Read labels to know what you are putting into your body.  There are so many options now, so check the shelves for products that are lower in sugar, sodium, and fat.  Opt for healthier alternatives, like whole grains, and higher fiber cereals. 

More and more people are deciding on a vegetarian, or even vegan, lifestyle.  Even if you don’t want to commit all the way, try going meat-free at least one day a week.

If you have a full cart of groceries and someone behind you in line has just one or two items, practice kindness by offering to let them go ahead of you.  If someone ahead of you is having trouble getting credit approval, or is taking a long time to write out a check, this is an opportunity to practice patience and compassion.

When checking out, have your discount cards or coupons ready so as not to keep the people behind you in line waiting longer than necessary.  Make sure to present your bags to the bag-person before he or she starts to pack.  If there is no one helping the cashier to bag the groceries, pitch in and help yourself.  Always show gratitude for the help you were given by expressing thanks.

And, of course, after you take the bags out of your cart and put them into your car, return the cart to the store rather than leaving it loose in the parking lot.

Everything in life, every moment we live, can be a meditation, a learning experience. With this state of mind, we can turn something like grocery shopping, which we might have thought of as a chore, into an adventure.

Seven days the jury deliberated. And now we have a verdict. Not guilty, times 10. So, what do we make of this? I don’t know what to think. I have followed the Michael Jackson case closely, and I wonder if the jurors heard something that I missed. If this were any “regular” person being accused of these crimes, would the jury come to the same conclusion? Certainly celebrities are viewed, and treated, differently in this society. What is it that about fame that gives these people their teflon coating? There are bound to be comparisons to the OJ Simpson trial, and Robert Blake, and now Michael Jackson. Are these men criminals, who used their money and popularity to seduce the public into believing in their innocence? Have they been able to successfully manipulate the justice system in their favor? Or have they gotten the fair trial and just verdict that they deserve? There are no easy answers. I watched as the verdicts were read this afternoon, and fans cheered, threw confetti, and let doves fly free in celebration. Who are these devotees who have given up their lives to “be there” in support of their beloved Michael? Some have traveled from around the world. They create quite a stir, as if their enthusiasm alone is enough to pull Michael through. The adulation, the tears, it’s all very dramatic – and maybe it’s just all a part of the show. Word has it that some of these groupies are actually paid to show up everyday. Money, after all, can buy just about anything. What irks me about this particular case is that Michael Jackson has set him self apart from the rest of society. He has made his own rules, and by letting him off the hook on all counts, society has basically said that it’s okay. There may not be a law about adults sleeping in a bed with children of a certain age, particularly children who are not their own, but there is a standard that society has set that says “this is not okay.” There are boundaries. There is responsible behavior. There is respectful behavior. And sleeping in a bed with someone else’s child is crossing that boundary. It is not responsible, or respectful, behavior. And yet somehow it’s okay for Michael Jackson to do just that. Michael clearly believes that he is innocent. And he believes that there is nothing wrong with his behavior towards children. But just because he believes that doesn’t make it right. Even when, back in 1993, he paid $20 million to a family in a civil case, that wasn’t enough make him understand that there is simply something wrong with his behavior. You’d think that would have taught the guy a lesson! But, no. Not only did he continue doing whatever the heck he wanted to do, he flaunted it on national television, for all the world to see. Michael Jackson is not a smart man, but in this case he outsmarted the jury. I don’t believe that he is innocent, or naive. I think that he considers himself separate from the rest of us, and that he plays the part he created so perfectly that he believes it himself. Michael Jackson is a musical genius. It is likely that he was abused as a child, and his childhood certainly was exploited. Yet that is no excuse for his behavior. He has been caught in lies many times – from denying his plastic surgeries to inflating the size of his bank accounts. And if he took a lie detector test I’d bet he would pass, because he totally believes what he says. The man wouldn’t survive a day in jail. Not because he’s too fragile, or because the inmates would make meatloaf out of him, but because he couldn’t handle the reality of the situation. He couldn’t reconcile his interpretation of reality with what smacks him in the face. It would drive him over the edge. What’s sad is that all of these people are paid to protect him, to worship him, to cater to his every whim. And yet no one is getting him the help he so desperately needs. It’s “the Emperor’s clothes” story. Maybe it will take a little child to speak up, and make Michael Jackson realize that what he is doing is just plain wrong. Or maybe not. Maybe this was our chance and it’s gone.

Healthcare

Years ago, when my son was diagnosed with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (AD/HD), my life changed.  I went from being a mother to also taking on the additional roles of advocate and mediator.  In order to help my son get the help he needed and the services he was entitled to in school, I had to learn everything I could about the educational system, the healthcare system, and the law.  It is a challenge to navigate all of this, and yet it is essential in order to work with teachers, administrators, doctors, and therapists as part of a team.  I learned a lot, thanks in large part to an organization called CHADD, Children and Adults with Attention Deficit Disorders.  This is a national, non-profit organization with local, volunteer-run chapters.  Our local chapter held monthly meetings, which allowed parents to keep up with the various issues and changes.  Most importantly, the meetings provided a forum for parents to network with each other and share experiences and resources.

We got over all the hurdles, and managed to get through the system despite the complexities.  My son is in college now, and he has the tools to advocate for himself.  But there are new kids coming up, and new parents who are starting from scratch to figure all of this out.  Luckily, CHADD is still on it, providing us with the ongoing information we need to help our kids. 

Following is an e-mail I received from CHADD regarding the current Healthcare Reform Legislation.  I am happy to share it with you, and hoping that it will encourage all of us to look at the many children and families who will benefit from healthcare reform.  To those of us working so diligently to take care of our children, this is most welcome, and long overdue.

“House of Representatives Passes
Comprehensive Healthcare Reform Legislation

Many Provisions Will Benefit
Children and Adults with AD/HD and Related Disorders

On Saturday, November 7, 2009, the U.S. House of Representatives passed a comprehensive healthcare reform bill, the Affordable Health Care for America Act (HR 3962) by a vote of 220-215. It is expected that the full Senate will debate and vote on its version of the bill in the coming weeks, which will then be followed by the House and Senate having its leaders meet in a conference to reconcile differences and produce a final piece of legislation that can be sent to the President.

CHADD, through its membership in the Consortium for Citizens with Disabilities, Campaign for Mental Health Reform, and the Mental Health Liaison Group has sent letters to members of Congress in support of the bill. CHADD’s views on and support for healthcare reform legislation can be viewed on the Healthcare Reform 2009 webpage and CHADD’s Leadership Blog. CHADD has no position on many of the provisions contained in the legislation. The three primary disability coalitions CHADD participates in, believe there are significant key provisions warranting support of the legislation. 

A few key provisions in the final House bill that will benefit children and adults with AD/HD and related disorders include:

    * Requiring most Americans to obtain health insurance, and mandating that most employers provide insurance to their employees, but also providing substantial federal subsidies to make coverage as affordable as possible;
    * Providing coverage of critical services for people with disabilities in the new Health Insurance Exchange’s essential benefits package including behavioral health treatment, and mental health and substance abuse services in compliance with the Wellstone-Domenici parity law, rehabilitation and habilitation services, equipment and supplies for children under 21 years of age;
    * Inclusion of “disability” as a category for purposes of health disparities;
    * Inclusion of the Community Living Assistance Services and Supports (CLASS) Act, a new national long term services insurance program to help adults with severe functional impairments to remain independent, employed, and a part of their communities; and
* Not allowing individual or group health insurance policies to establish lifetime or annual limits on the dollar value of benefits and the elimination of discrimination based on health status or a pre-existing condition.

CHADD continues to actively monitor developments in healthcare reform. Updated information on the legislation, CHADD’s 13 principles for healthcare reform, children’s mental health coalition’s five principles for healthcare reform and CHADD’s work with other partner coalitions can be viewed on CHADD’s website: http://www.chadd.org “

Tom Cruise is in the news again. If you haven’t heard, he’s got a new girlfriend, the much-younger Katie Holmes. They each have a blockbuster movie coming out this summer, so the publicity can’t hurt either of them. If Tom would just stick to promoting his movie and enthusing about his newfound love life, I wouldn’t have any complaint with him. I mean, live and let live, right? But Tom is imposing his opinions, beliefs, misinformed judgments or whatever else you want to call them, all over the place. His target? Actress and now author, Brooke Shields. Brooke has just written a book chronicling her battle with post-partum depression. I applaud Brooke for her honest and straight-forward account of this debilitating condition that so many women go through without even knowing what it is. After her child was born, this usually easy-going, productive, intelligent woman fell into the depths of despair. She couldn’t function, and questioned her very existence. So after much research, she finally took her doctor’s advice and went on an anti-depressant medication. It was enough to get her over the hump and it very likely saved her life. So why would Tom Cruise, who as far as we all know has never given birth, never suffered from depression, and is not a medical doctor, condemn Brooke’s very personal decision? Because he’s a Scientologist. And Scientologists don’t believe in “mind altering” medications. He has said in the press that there is “no science” to prove that anti-depressants are effective. According to Tom, Brooke could have cured her depression with vitamins and exercise. Hello? Tom, have you ever heard of a PET scan? Is that not science enough for you? Puh-leez! Do some research! Better yet, have some compassion. I’m the first one to get on board with any kind of natural remedy. I wrote a book “The Healthy Family Handbook: Natural Remedies for Parents and Children.” But I also know that there are certain things that western science can do that nothing else can. If someone were facing surgery, say they needed a tumor taken out to relieve excruciating pain, would Tom suggest that they take a vitamin and walk around the block instead? Physical pain is no different than emotional pain. One starts in the body, the other starts in the brain. The mind and body are intricately linked. God made man, and made us intelligent, and intelligence made anti-depressants, so to me those medications are no less from God than vitamins. Taken in the right circumstances, under a doctor’s care, they can help people. And they certainly were able to help Brooke Shields. Who is Tom to argue with that? Who is he to judge? He is certainly entitled to make his own decisions, for himself, but to judge another person as he did is not only cruel, it’s criminal. Will some other woman going through post-partum depression feel guilty taking her doctor’s advice and instead of taking necessary medication, take a vitamin? Why should she suffer for Tom’s arrogance? Tom may play the hero in the movies, but in this instance, he’s playing the villain – the ignorant, self-important, destructive bad guy.

There is an old saying that says: “Make new friends, and keep the old.  One is silver, the other is gold.” Life is all about relationships.  We have a relationship with the environment, with our work, with our home, and especially with the people in our lives.  Earth Month gives us an opportunity to look at how we can make things last, to best maximize the resources we have.  It takes a lot of energy to develop a friendship.  A friendship is an investment of our time and emotions.  And we benefit from having these people in our lives in countless ways.  How can we best sustain our relationships, given the overwhelming obligations that we face on a daily basis?  Here are a few tips: -Be available.  Sure, you’ve got an e-mail, cell-phone and facebook page.  But can your friends really reach you?  Sometimes we’re so bogged down by technology that we forget the reasons we got started on it in the first place.  We can get our social networking “friends” mixed up with our true friends, the ones who want to be there for us no matter what our status update says.  So, when a friend is moving, reach out and offer to help.  If a friend is going through a hard time, go over and hold her hand.  Take him our to dinner and let him talk.  Let your friends know that you are there for them, with your actions, as well as your words. -Be honest.  Honesty is the most important key to making any relationship work, and last.  Always tell the truth.  It’s that simple.  Honesty, integrity, authenticity, and trust – they all go hand in hand.  Do what you say you are going to do.  Show up when expected.  There is no need to judge or criticize, allow your friend to be himself, as they allow you to be yourself.  -Be present.  When you are with your friends, really be with your friends.  Don’t allow yourself to be distracted by your iPhone or anything that is happening outside of the present moment.  Listen, and respond.  Make this time together your priority.  Enjoy your friendship, relax and be yourself. -Be in touch.  Check in with your friends.  Ask how they are doing.  Know what is happening in their lives.  Invite people over.  Connect.  Years go by really quickly, and before you know it, friendships fade away.  Take just a moment to touch base with your friends and let them know that you appreciate them.  Show this person in your life how wonderful they are, and much they mean to you.  Send birthday cards, make phone calls, and write thank you notes.  Share photos online, and stay involved even from afar. -Be mindful.  If a relationship is draining you, if it no longer serves you, or makes you feel bad, then it’s time to walk away.  Relationships should be healthy, and make you feel good.  The best friendships nurture your spirit.  So if a relationship is toxic, then follow the environmental tip and “reduce” it from your life.  Remember that your first relationship is with yourself.  Be true to yourself.

November 4. This will always be such an important day in my life. This is the day my first child was born. I remember the day so well. And that day my life changed more than it ever has. Freddy has taught me so much. He was never an “easy” kid. He challenges me at every turn. I have learned more about patience, and acceptance, and unconditional love than I ever thought possible. Being Freddy’s mom has made me grow, and become more of who I am. I remember the days of Ninja Turtles, of Power Rangers, of X-Men. I remember the play-dates, the birthday parties, the favorite socks. There were struggles, and there were triumphs. And I can honestly say that we have never been bored! Now my baby has become an adult. This is his 18th birthday. Though Freddy’s childhood may be coming to an end, my motherhood continues. My role will change, as it should, but I will always be Freddy’s mom. Now instead of action figures, Freddy is collecting college applications. Freddy is making his own “Mac N Cheese” and I’m sending him quarters for his laundry. Freddy is still blazing the trail for all of us in the family. He was the first child, first grandchild, first cousin, and now he’s the first adult of this new generation. We’re all getting used to the idea, because the other kids are following close behind! ]]>

Ah, Spring has Sprung!  It’s a time of change, renewal, and allergies!  Something is in the air that has me sniffling like crazy.  Spring is Kapha season, so I’m doing some dosha balancing rituals to help keep my Kapha from getting out of control.  Just something more for the “to do” list these days.  I have to keep our squirrel feeder filled to the brim with peanuts because one of our little squirrel friends is preggers.  She’s so sweet, and we want to keep her well fed and happy.  The birds are nesting under the eaves right outside out kitchen window.  Flowers are blooming, and there is a new energy in the air to go with the sunshine.  Gotta love it!

Things are so busy around here that I can afford to be a little more particular than usual about what auditions I choose to go on.  My agent called last week with a commercial for me.  He starts by giving me all the details, time, place, and so forth.  And then he says: “You are reading for the role of bungee jumper.”  Very calmly he says this!  I’m like – what?!  Say that again?  Does that mean I have to bungee jump?  “Yes,” he replies.  Uh no, I insist.  Not doing that one!  Sure, I’d love a national television spot – but there are just some things I won’t do, even (or especially) for the camera: strip, eat meat, and leap head first into oblivion with a stretchy cord tied to my ankles.  Safety first, you know what I mean?  I’d like to think that I am just as adventurous as I ever was, I’m just not as crazy!  Still susceptible to hay fever, but I’m a little more immune to Spring Fever.

It’s been a long road leading up to this election. Emotions have been high. We’ve been through a lot. And now it’s over. So, what do we do? Clearly, some healing needs to take place. Even though we have a “winner” and George W. Bush will continue to lead this country for another four years, the 49% of the population who voted for John Kerry are faced with feelings of disappointment. Things didn’t go our way. And now there’s the worry that for the next four years our convictions will be dismissed. But the truth is that whoever ended up being president is the right choice. Because if we trust in the Universal Law, then we know that right action takes place at all times, in all places. Everything is going to be okay. That’s the mantra, repeat after me: everything is okay! We have to remember that there is an organizing power at work, that everything happens for a reason, that there are no accidents. Take a deep breath. Everything is okay. The issues are out on the table. We have been heard. We will continue to learn, and to grow, as individuals, and as a nation. ]]>

Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr join forces with the David Lynch Foundation to promote meditation!  The CNN article

Its been more than a week since the big election.  I had to wait for things to sink in and settle down before I could actually wrote about it all.  The absolute joy of election night was tempered by profound disappointment that California could actually pass Proposition 8.

I’ve never been more proud to be an American.  We have elected a new president who is smart, enthusiastic and visionary.  This is exactly what we need right now.  Barack Obama represents not only change, but optimism.  This is history in the making.  It’s a time when the United States has chosen consciously to move forward, embracing the future despite any challenges.

I’ve never been more disheartened to be a Californian.  California was the third state in the nation to make same-sex marriages legal.  And yet Proposition 8, which takes those civil rights away from people, managed to pass.  This is devastating, and so unlike our open-minded, open-hearted state.  I can only hope that the Supreme Court finds Prop. 8 to be unconstitutional.

The euphoria of the election has worn off.  It didn’t take long.  And now we see that we are faced with the same issues, they didn’t magically go away.  But we will get through these next few weeks by knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel  and it’s not an oncoming train!  We need to learn from the mistakes of the past.  We need to be present and aware of what is happening at the moment.  And we need to plan for, and look forward to, a more balanced and healthy global community.